To: The Broomfield, CO Police Officer Who Pulled Me Over the Other Night From: Sam Smith Re: Goddamned Colorado Drivers To begin with, sir (I’m sorry that I didn’t catch your name […]
What the hell happened to country music?
Friend: Hey, Yogi, I think we’re lost. Yogi Berra: Yeah, but we’re making great time! It’s probably clear to anybody who pays attention that I’m a rock & roll guy. But I […]
Tales of a blown ACL and shredded meniscus: fondly reminiscing about my first knee surgery
“Damn, Sam – that looks like it hurts.” On January 8, 1998, while playing basketball at my club, I made a beautiful back door cut, took a nice pass, and came to […]
Time to kiss off online dating: a long-overdue farewell to Match.com
Recently I was e-mailed, via Match.com, by an attractive woman (to the extent that profile pictures can be trusted, anyway) named Kathleen. I love that name, and her profile made her sound […]
It was 20 years ago today…and I still miss Freddie
Freddie Mercury was my John Lennon. I remember when Lennon was killed. I also remember the reactions of his fans. I liked The Beatles, of course, but they were a few years […]
Dear Judge Adams: No, it was worse than it looked
“He who spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him correcteth him betimes.” (Proverbs 13:24) “Withhold not correction from a child: for if thou strike him with the rod, […]
The lie detector is a lie, the polygraph is my bitch, and Americans should stop acting like slack-jawed yokels
Last week I found myself in a doctor’s waiting room for a few minutes, and the staff had the TV tuned to one of those daily Dr. Phil/Maury/Jerry/Montel type freak circuses where […]
For divorced men everywhere: a small, flowery statement
I don’t often do confessional. Yeah, a lot of what I’m going through finds its way into my posts in symbolic fashion, perhaps, but I haven’t done much in the way of […]
Post #1,000: four years along one writer's bumpy road
In Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell posits what we might call the 10,000-Hour Theory – that is, to become exceptional at something, you have to dedicate 10,000 hours to it. Whether you’re an aspiring […]
