If porn has taught us anything, it’s that sex is a beautiful expression of love between a man and a woman and their babysitter. Your Daily Devotional is a lightly-edited entry from […]

Election Day is just a made-up holiday promoted by the greeting card industry in order to sell more Election Day cards. Your Daily Devotional is a lightly-edited entry from my Twitter feed. […]

Remember, Daylight Savings Time ends this weekend. When you wake up Sunday morning, we’ll be back on Daylight Squandering Time. Your Daily Devotional is a lightly-edited entry from my Twitter feed. Follow […]

I’m feeling kind of lazy this Halloween. Where do you go to buy the apples with the razor blades already in them? The Daily Devotional is a lightly-edited entry from my Twitter […]

What’s up with the Red Sox and their hipster beards? Are their starters into throwing obscure pitches you probably haven’t heard of? The Daily Devotional is a lightly-edited entry from my Twitter […]

The Andy Griffith Show, season 53: “For the last time, Barney, Obama is not a Muslim.”

In Rocky 7, Rocky Balboa imagines that the nursing home attendants are stealing his Social Security checks. Offers to fight them. The Daily Devotional is a lightly-edited entry from my Twitter feed. […]

First they came for the mimes, and I didn’t speak out, because I was hoping they’d appreciate the irony. The Daily Devotional is a lightly-edited entry from my Twitter feed. Follow me […]

I don’t have a bucket list. I have a fuck it list, as in “fuck it, I’m never going to get around to doing any of this stuff.” The Daily Devotional is […]