Donald meets Franklin Graham

Franklin: God bless you, my son. Fear not. The Lord is with you.

Donald: I don’t go to church much.

Franklin: Maybe it’s time you start.

Donald: I’m just so tired on Sunday mornings.

Franklin: I know how it is. Work all day. A set of keys all day.

Donald: How do you mean?

Franklin: When this country had faith in God, we didn’t lock our doors. Now we’re afraid and we have a ring full of keys.

Donald: That’s deep, Reverend. You should put that in a sermon.

Franklin: Our keys have been dosed with radiation. It’s not enough to burn you, but it will give you cancer if you carry them around in your pocket day after day.

Donald: That’s the nuttiest conspiracy I’ve ever heard.

Franklin: Easily disproven if you’d care to test it.

Donald: Wow. That’s evil. I mean, I’m no saint, but, just wow. That is truly evil.

Franklin: Fear not, my son. The Lord has declared China to be a godless nation and an abomination upon the earth. They must repent and return to him through Jesus, or they will surely be destroyed.

Note: This is satire. For all I know, Donald Trump’s hair is real.