Or, Bromancing the Stone, and other bad puns…
It started with “bromance,” the idea of being in love (non-sexual, mind you) with someone of the same sex. Then it became “Flomance,” being in love with an obnoxious television character named “Flo” of course. Now I just read “throwmance,” used by Jon Greenberg to describe NFL quarterback Jay Cutler’s habit of only throwing to one receiver per season (formerly Earl Bennett, now Brandon Marshall). Where will this end?
Here it is, a little more summer frivolity—the Mance Dictionary.
- Doughmance—what young college graduates dream of but will never see because of student loans
- Blowmance—a love for a particular sexual practice
- VanGoghmance—a love of Impressionist painters
- Fromance—a love of hairstyles of the sixties and seventies
- Nomance—see T’eo, Manti
- Pomance—love of the poor and downtrodden
- Homance—see Grant, Hugh
- Toemance—see Ryan, Rex
- Whoamance—the GOP’s love of the filibuster to block anything proposed by the Dems
- Joemance—an inexplicable attraction to vice presidents
- Promance—the desire of a young athlete to one day drive a Maybach and date a hot starlet
OK, OK, we all know you can do better. Fomance (Moses “Fo, Fo and Fo” Malone is too old school for this crew), but Lowmance, Glowmance, and Growmance are all still out there, as are any number of clever homonyms I haven’t even thought of, like Breauxmance (fraternal love between two Cajun men).
Have at it.