What's It Wednesday

What's it Wednesday

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by Djerrid

Categories: What's It Wednesday

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  5. (An homage to Ubertramp; considerable liberties taken.)

    You’ll recall from last week’s WIW — a solar sail — that Ubertramp had just barely escaped the 47-year-long war with the Ainsca. He was forced to flee because, thanks to a bribe of the Lipari in the Eolian Islands of Italy, he had managed to pilfer a cross-dimensional parasite, whose scientific designation is TS4(untranslatable)-97, but most people call it “timedust.” It’s a “high-tech” peyote Ubertramp had planned to “buy” from Queen Iredupix of the Ditori.

    But alas, he screwed her (fiscally; she’s a monocytastic queen incapable of mating with a humanoid, but she had fallen in love with him). So Ubertramp stole her premier Trans-Gal Cruiser, The Ellington, powered by that solar sail, made of a temperature-resistant fiber filament outer layer of an Ission K’nor fireboard, same as the skin of the Ellington.

    Ubertramp had hoped to unload the TS4(untranslatable)-97 on a specific branch of the TI known as the Fellowship of the Rose in change from chunks of their nitrogen glacier, a necessary component of Ellington’s fuel supply.

    Sadly, the Ellington was trapped by what you see in today’s WIW — a cross current between two intersecting gravity waves. Normally, they can be dispersed with sufficient anti-matter weaponry; however, the Ellington was armed only with a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster.

    Sadly, the Ellington was destroyed. Observers noted at least three rescue pods released from the ship. It is not know if Ubertramp was aboard any; it is not known whether the intersecting gravity waves destroyed the pods.

    A memorial service is planned.

  6. MRI, psah! This is clearly a series of time lapse photographs of the iceberg hit by the Titanic taken by a satellite in geosync. Given that the Titanic sank in 1912, the data could have been collected from any of three groups collecting data on Earth resources at the time. The Cervantes Corporation (known universally for their high end “entertainers.” The Earth branch was very much involved with geisha in Japan), the Sandghavan (known mostly for mining various base ores, but they also dabble in the trade of rare, exotic, usually non-sentient plants), and Section Vil (a strictly virtual company with a, what we would call, AI governing board that deals in virtual tourism). I suspect it’s the last option. Especially since they came out with a very realistic hyper-detailed web-E based on the accident about 45 years ago. But no one has been able to verify it.

  8. BTW, I didn’t think of the solar sail option for last week. I was convinced it was the signature armband of a TI group in Scotland that specialized in political assassination. Not much is known about them, for obvious reasons, but they often left behind an armband at the assassination site, usually somewhere on the victims person. Not to brag or build a reputation of fear (although, that certainly was an added benefit) so much as to let their employers know who did the job. It made getting paid so much easier. That would certain explain any blood Djerrid may have found on it when he mistook it as a band-aid.