♫♪ If there’s a bustle in your hedgerow, don’t be alarmed now / It’s just the latest Nota Bene♫♪ (Two days late due to the tech issues.) Enjoy! … Benito Mussolini, limey bastard … There’s the White House, and then there’s thee White House … The timeless wonder of timekeepers … Betcha didn’t know the NFL had a quantum mechanics lab … It’s good to be the king. Or is it? … Where the hell is Treebeard when you need him? … Score one for the media and a “romping, stomping patriot” … Guess who’s a title sponsor at Live Earth 2010. Have sick sack at the ready … As a 30-year Phillies fan and Colorado transplant myself, I agree with this guy’s sentiment: Rockies fans are class acts. Broncos fans are pretty much the opposite … Got a spare $200 million and a barbed wire fetish? Or perhaps $57 million for a room with a view? … Sure to make the ladies swoon … “It’s a rather remarkable chemical, but the evidence is it’s bad for you” … Shirtless Obama now has a GOP Shirtless Rival … If you can’t beat ‘em (i.e., heathens), sue the shit out of ‘em … Meet the intriguing Joey Sayers … Icecrobatics … Some might prefer “Biggus Dickus” … Guess which Fox shithead is claiming, “What was once the Bush recession is now the Bush recovery” … The ultimate Rickroll … This guy really wants his bike back … Pop quote: “The songs that I think are the most retarded songs I’ve written end up being the biggest hits” … Romell Brown defied death 18 times in a single sitting … Le crabs, sacre bleu! … You’re guaranteed to mutter “no shit” to yourself at least a dozen times as you read this … Rock quote: “It’s always frustrated me that rock and roll has always been stuck in writing about youth things, and it shouldn’t be” … Fair winds and fine seas to you, young lady … Oswald acted alone—or did he? (cue ominous music) … The X-Files might be attempting a hat trick of film sucktitude … Cindy Sheehan tries to empower you … You can’t tuna fish but you can still tune a piano … RIP, Captain Lou … Markos Moulitsas to Harry Reid: FU … This guy to himself: FU … Finally, a coach the Raiders can soar with … Nothing a bag of blue pills couldn’t solve … Kinky Friedman says he’s like Gandhi … Yay! Teresa Strasser’s a mom … Los Lobos finally make it to the White House … Guess who’s not getting into Hea-ven! … An old boxing champ reunites with another old boxing chomp—er, champ … A short you won’t find on Pixar’s DVDs … “Right now I am best described as a fat starving artist” … And finally, Hugo Chávez plays a mean air guitar. ∞