There’s an old saying in Tennessee—I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee—that says, fool me once, shame on the latest issue of Nota Bene. Enjoy! … I always thought it was Gandalf anyway … Well, the girl can someday try to kick for CU … Bow to pinball messiah … Nine weirdest things ever at Yale. They left off George W. Bush … Bring on the cyborgs … Oceans are “the victims of a giant Ponzi scheme, waged with Madoff–like callousness by the world’s fisheries” … Yeah, good luck with that, Babs … Enjoy this sack of Pearljammy, Soundgardeny goodness … [Insert Uranus joke here] … Fear and loathing at the bottom of the world … Someone picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue … Rock quote: “I’m like an Internet whore” … EU to doubters: FU … Man, were the 70’s a fun time to be a kid … Vodkaput … Peter Criss: KISS member, breast cancer survivor … Don’t worry, Jesus will bring plenty of jobs with him when he soon returns … “Yeah, I’ll have a McRembrandt, a Diet Mona and of course French fries. And go large, Pierre” … Frances Bean has much to learn about irony … The South still has liberals? … Imus finds a safe haven … Like, I thought “like” would like win this. Whatever … A geek-rock classic marks 20 years, and a patron saint of rock geekness reflects … The mouse that roars (at developer whores) … Uh, were Medgar Evers alive, don’t you think he would object to this? … Rock quote: “I put two hexes on people and they both worked; it took almost 20 years to get rid of that Satanic depression” … Nat X was kind of prophetic—we may soon have the Saint Louis Niggers … “Chapter One. Last night I dreamt that I slapped Franz Liszt with a red snapper and then made sweet love to a Venus de Milo made of marzipan. I wonder what it means” … Christopher Columbus gets life in prison … Will we ever stop missing him? … So — now you have some idea of what Joe Brainard liked in bed … “When you have already died inside, there is nothing left to kill” … John Elway’s weirdest audible … Have tissues ready as you read this … You’ve got something in your pants … Brian Wilson promises one more stroke of genius … And finally, kneel before Zog. ∞
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