Funny

What if — Obama logic applied to presidencies past

Now don’t get me wrong, I like Obama and think his best days are still to come. But his administration has so far been a strange collection of backtracks, waverings, retreats, retreads, flip-flops, cricket chirps and sellouts, with a few successes here and there.

Friend of mine saw a link somewhere that wondered what it would be like if Team Obama applied its logic on health care to other progressive battles in history. He lost the exact link, which I don’t have either, so I hope my list below isn’t copycatting someone else too closely (email or comment if so, esp. if you have the link in question).

Anyway, here are a few headlines from history, if Obama logic was at work…

McKinley encourages gun presence at town hall meets
Popular president gleams, ‘Americans exercising rights is a beautiful thing’

HOOVER FILLS TREASURY WITH J.P. MORGAN EXECUTIVES
‘RICH PEOPLE GOT US INTO THIS MESS, THEY’LL GET US OUT’

FDR Drinks with Hitler at Berghof ‘Beer Summit’
Hails Chamberlain approach, says ‘no one even knows’ where Sudetenland located

TRUMAN ORDERS DRONES OVER JAPAN, KOREA, CHINA
‘Tojo could be anywhere, but we’ll get him’; warns wedding parties

KENNEDY: MOON MISSION, ‘SPACE RACE’ NOT WORTH EFFORT
‘Let Soviets do it’; JFK says NASA broke, funds better spent on eavesdropping tech

LBJ: ‘War on Poverty’ too costly
President focuses budget priorities on bank bailouts

NIXON BEGS CHINA: BUY OUR PRODUCTS!
Admits US markets weak but insists ‘dollar still groovy’; polls in freefall

Ford pardons Nixon, Haldeman, Mitchell, Liddy, entire Watergate crew
To horror of even GOP lawmakers, president says ‘time to put past behind us’

CARTER DECLARES ECONOMIC DOWNTURN ‘THROUGH’
Foresees easy reelection in post-Nixon political era

Reagan Kowtows to Dems on Welfare, Soc Security
President says bipartisanship, talks with liberal Yellow Dogs ‘keys to success’

EX-VP BUSH TAKES REINS, NAMES NANCY REAGAN SEC. OF STATE
Inauguration Promise: ‘Read My Lips, No New Taxes on the Middle Class in First 100 Days’

Clinton backtracks on ‘don’t ask don’t tell,’ prefers straight military
Disappointed gays left in lurch; author Morrison calls Clinton ‘first white black president’

BIN LADEN CAUGHT, AL-QAEDA DESTROYED
‘Proud’ President Bush brings US forces home, UN promises Afghanistan rebuild
WORLD HAILS SADDAM STEPDOWN IN IRAQ; ANNAN CREDITS US DIPLOMACY
VP Cheney says Patriot Act to be rescinded accordingly — Dow rises to 20,000

Crossposted from JAZZ from HELL

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