From the “Our elected representatives don’t give a damn what we the people want done as long as they’re not incurring His Majesty George’s displeasure” desk:
This just in – George W. Bush has found his missing WMD’s – they were down at the other end of Pennsylvania Avenue at Capitol Hill. They have been positively identified as Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) and Sen. Harry Reid (D-NV).
Oh…you thought I meant Weapons of Mass Destruction? No, no, don’t be silly. There never were any of those. That was just some crap the Bush camp made up as an excuse to invade Iraq.
I meant War Mongering Democrats….
Pelosi and Reid say that this is a “first step” toward ending the war.
So. Let me see if I’ve got this straight:
The House and Senate have both approved giving this incompetent, lying, petulant little bully ONE HUNDRED BILLION DOLLARS to continue pouring down the death ridden rat hole that is the Iraq War and in return he has promised to remove the troops…when? Oh that’s right. HE DOESN’T HAVE TO WTHDRAW THE TROOPS AT ALL IF HE DOESN’T WANT TO.
From the “Now that I have the bucks to pay those overdue Halliburton invoices”desk:
This just in – President Bush expects this summer in Iraq to be a bloodbath:
“What they’re going to try to do is kill as many innocent people as they can to try to influence the debate here at home.”
That George – always willing to reduce the deaths of our troops and of innocent Iraqis into mere political fodder.
Perhaps the reason is this:
The predictions of more bloodshed came at a time when Americans’ assessment of the war has never been worse, according to a CBS News/New York Times poll that said 76 percent of Americans believed the war was going somewhat or very badly for the United States.
Only 20 percent said the recent troop increase was making a positive difference, and just 23 percent approved Bush’s handling of the war. His overall job approval was 30 percent.
This, of course brings us back to Bush’s newly discovered WMD’s….
And, finally, from the “Osama? What’s an Osama?” desk:
Dubya reports that the US is still searching for Osama Bin Laden (remember him – he was the guy actually reponsible for the Al Qaeda attacks of 9/11/01):
“He’s not out there traipsing around. He’s not leading many parades. He’s not out feeding the hungry. He’s isolated, trying to kill people to achieve his objective.”
This differs some from his view of Osama of 2002, as he was doing the con job that led us into the Iraq quagmire:
“I don’t know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don’t care. It’s not that important. It’s not our priority.”
So. Bush still doesn’t know where Bin Laden is, but at least Osama has something to occupy his time….
Feel safer yet? Or freer?