I have no idea whether Herman Cain did or did not assault the four women who have accused him of sexual assault. But something he said during his press conference last Tuesday has me very suspicious. According to news reports, Cain said the following at least twice:
I have never acted inappropriately with anyone. Period.
Why does this statement make me suspicious, you ask? Simply put, any man who makes this claim and isn’t the second coming of Jesus is a liar.
I don’t know a single man who hasn’t acted inappropriately with regard to a woman (or another man, if gay) at some point in his adult life. Some men brag about their sexual conquests to their buddies or on social media. Some mime sexual acts to make their boorish buddies laugh. Some quote inappropriate comedians at socially awkward times. Some reveal personal secrets they were told by a woman in confidence. Continue reading →
The bar was overcrowded, and a thick mist of human perspiration hung limply in stale air. There were a couple of thrash bands playing that night, and I’d gone with a handful of friends to see the show. My buddy Dusty and a couple of his girlfriends hung back in the crowd, opting to avoid the seething belligerence that was mounting amongst that predominantly male audience. I planted myself right at the edge of the mosh pit, from where I could see the bands and assess the chaos. I knew some of the guys dancing. They’d taken off their shirts, and were doing their best to incite all of the audience into a frenzy. Some were too drunk, and the aggressions inspired by violent music were beginning to verge on assault. These guys weren’t my friends, and on the best days they’d barely give me a nod passing me on the street. I was afraid of them. They were rippled sociopaths, with proclivities for steroids and methamphetamines. Adrenaline astir, heart rates accelerated, they metabolized their booze quickly, impairing their judgment in ways they wouldn’t otherwise have anticipated. The guys in the mosh pit were all buddies, and it seemed to me that they were just waiting for an interloper to stumble into their madness. Hands clenched, those fists were starving. Continue reading →
I had my editorial all planned out in my head. First, Mississippi was going to be the first state to approve the thoroughly idiotic state constitutional amendment defining a fertilized egg (a zygote) as a person. Second, I… well, I never got past that first step, because Mississippi voters did the smart thing and voted down an amendment that would have made pregnant women second-class citizens at best, and livestock at worst. Continue reading →
“And thus thy fall hath left a kind of blot,
To mark the full-fraught man and best indued
With some suspicion. I will weep for thee;
For this revolt of thine, methinks, is like
Another fall of man.”
- Henry V, Act II, Scene 2
by Terry Hargrove
King Henry V was addressing Lord Scroop, a childhood friend who had sold him out to the French just before the English invasion. If the King couldn’t trust Lord Scroop, who could he trust?
These are tough times for a smartass like me. I want to mock the Kardashians and Newt Gingrich and whatever Twilight movie is about to be released (2 parts? Really? Does she need 2 parts to decide on a crib?). But all I can think about is Joe Paterno. Continue reading →